Anything that hampers listening sets up barriers that prevent understanding and closes the door to the ultimate goal of communication – producing constructive action. Barriers to listening are found in physical situations, in attitudes, and in behavior. Awareness of barriers allows you to take appropriate action to keep the door to communication open.
We talked about Physical Barriers…now on to Attitude Barriers.
Attitudes that block communication are often easily detected, but sometimes they are not all that apparent. Sometimes it is possible just to look at certain people and tell that they are only pretending to listen, or that they feel no real concern for the topic. In contrast, some people convincingly pretend to be interested when they actually have already made up their minds and are closed to new ideas. Other similar attitudes lead to tuning out the speaker, discounting the
worth of a speaker on the basis of appearance, voice, or other external attributes.
One of the most prevalent attitude barriers in communication is selective listening. Because we would like to hear only what pleases us or fits into our preconceived plans and ideas, it is easy to discount or filter out messages we find unpleasant or disagreeable.
Because selective listening is so devastating to relationships, become aware of any areas where you practice it. Devise a plan for changing your attitude and, as a result, your behavior. An attitude barrier that is just as devastating as selective listening is overreacting. Making snap judgments, losing control of emotions, and other inappropriate reactions – especially when they occur before the entire message has been delivered – destroy any hopes to mutual understanding and cooperation.
The best tools for overcoming attitude barriers to communication are a strong, secure self-image and a belief in the worth of other people. Recognize that communication is more than sending; it is also receiving. Explore strategies for strengthening your self-esteem, and put them into practice. Decide to treat others with respect in spite of what they may say, think, or do. Demonstrate genuine empathy in all your interpersonal relationships. These commitments promote understanding and result in constructive action.
Stay Tuned for Part 3 – Behavior Barriers…
LMI Journal 2012
Recent Comments